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Doctor Hu Consultation

The consultation was GOOD! If having cancer is good, I have the best kind. So there were three bad juju diagnosis' that I could have had. I had none! I have no cancer (detectable) in my lymph nodes. I don't have weird (his word, not mine) cancer cells and I don't have some other long word that I can't pronounce or spell. Good thing because I can't spell it! Dr. Hu was in agreement about not doing Chemo/radiation because there is no detectable cancer anywhere else (Good thing because I wasn't doing it anyway). He says I can save that for another time if I need it. (Not happening and I won't need it because I have dog wormer, woof woof).


So basically, if you are going to have aggressive, muscle invasive cancer, mine is the best kind to have. Dr. Hu (Not Who) was very upbeat and positive. I'm glad because when I saw his picture before he came onto the video consult, I was SCARED!!! I have grandsons who look older than his picture. I was happy to see some grey in all that black hair when he came on the screen. (Big sigh of relief) Nice guy and now I think I will let him cut, scrape, chop, glue, tape and sew on me.


I tried to get him to do a little lyposuction because he needs some fat to go between my new bladder and my colon. I have lots of places that I would like him to take some off of but he says no. It has something to do with an Hippocratic oath or something. (Means I won't take work from my fellow surgeons when we can charge double for the same thing at two different times). I say, why waste good anesthesia since I'm already down and a little trimming and shaping should be standard procedure for as much as we pay for surgery. The kind of fat on my ass and my spare tire are the wrong kind, he says. I think we should come out of surgery looking much better than before we went in! I'm not asking for Kim Kardashian's backside but I would like a little lift and tuck.


OK, so surgery is scheduled for the 30th. No robotics. He will do it all unassisted. Wonder how that will work since he's not gutting me like a fish. He says a couple of little cuts on the the stomach wall and yank it all out from the natural opening. Does he do it by feel? What happens if he mistakes one part for something else? Does a stomach feel the same as a bladder by feel? I think I want to keep the stomach. Food is kinda important and I've become accustomed to having it occasionally, although I could use less of it at this point, thus the lyposuction request. Can he glue it back in if I still need it? He must have little hands. That's a relief because I don't want new holes big enough to drive a truck through. Hard to hide those behind a bikini, which I intend to be wearing by May. Ok, well maybe not a bikini... There are just some things that shouldn't be seen in public when you hit my age. Some people could take a lesson here when they go to Walmart. Please just look in the mirror (front AND back) and ask yourself, would Rayna wear this outside on the front porch? If the answer is no, it's not acceptable to wear out of the yard let alone in town. Please go back to the closet and try again. If it's not there, look under the bed, in the dryer, on the floor, the toybox...OK, you get the point.


So now we are on hold until the 26th of December when I leave for sunny California... Merry Christmas Everyone!





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